Want To Be More Than Companions? Hate your body? 4 ways to get your sex life back

Editor's note: Ian Kerner, a sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author, writes about sex for CNN Health. Read more from him on his website, GoodInBed.

(CNN) -- It's been a week since Turkey Day, but are you still feeling the potentially fattening effects? Has a sense of bloat invaded your bedroom?

If recent research is any indication, dissatisfaction with your body -- feeling overweight, unattractive or physically unappealing -- could be putting a crimp in your love life.

The study, published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, looked at the way men and women view their bodies during sex, a concept known as body appearance cognitive distraction during sexual activity.

More than 660 people answered questions about their satisfaction with their bodies during sex, as well as their satisfaction with the way they believed their sexual partners viewed their bodies.

The researchers found that being generally dissatisfied with one's body and being unhappy with particular body parts predicted body appearance cognitive distraction during sexual activity. For women, their partner's perceived opinion of their body ("He must think my stomach is too fat or my breasts are too small") also had a negative effect on sexual self-esteem.

It's certainly not uncommon to worry about the way our bodies look, from a spare tire to some cellulite. But when these concerns carry over from the dressing room to the bedroom, they can have a real impact on the ability to feel sexy.

According to a 2011 survey by the makers of the herbal supplement Fembido, 52% of women say that a lack of confidence about their bodies makes them reluctant to be intimate. Admittedly, any survey conducted by a drug company interested in enhancing female desire should be taken with a grain of salt, but previous research has shown that this cognitive distraction can affect sexual self-esteem, assertiveness, arousal, pleasure and even orgasm.

"Bodily concerns can reduce both the frequency and quality of sex," explained Justin Lehmiller, a Harvard University social psychologist and sex columnist. "For one thing, people who do not feel attractive or sexy will be less likely to initiate sex and more likely to turn down offers for it."

So how can you put the "love" back in your love handles? Start by gently asking yourself (or your partner) what's at the root of disinterest in sex.

"Hiding behind being too tired, too busy or too stressed for intimacy are common excuses when the real reason may have to do with body image," said Amy Levine, sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure. Once you've admitted that you may be feeling less than attractive, work on increasing your self-esteem with these tips:

Get to know your pedals and brakes.

According to the dual control model of sexual response, we all have gas pedals (things that excite us) and brakes (things that inhibit us). Your personal pedals could be a particular fantasy, the scent of your partner's cologne or a flash of long legs, for example. And your brakes could be the fear of not pleasing your partner or, yes, the idea of disgusting him or her with your round belly or thinning hair.

The good news: "By being mindful and learning to enjoy the way your body responds to touch, you can train your 'brakes' to ignore body image and other thoughts that can impede sexual arousal and orgasm," sex educator Emily Nagoski writes.

Tune in to tune out.

Music may help take you out of your body and increase arousal, recent research suggests. One study conducted by a music psychologist commissioned by the music site Spotify found that 40% of people say that music was more important to their sexual arousal than their partner's physique and even his or her touch. So queue up some Marvin Gaye, Barry White or Kings of Leon -- top picks for a sexy playlist, according to Spotify.

Boost self-esteem slowly.

Although the visuals of sex add to many people's arousal, they can slam on the brakes for those who feel less than attractive. Ease your way into things by slowing moving from pitch-black surroundings to dim lighting. Consider wearing a sexy chemise or other lingerie to cover body parts that concern you, Levine says, and then slowly removing it as you feel more comfortable.

Do the math.

Studies show that many men are dissatisfied with the size of their penis, while many women worry about the size of their breasts. But the truth is, "most men actually report being happy with their partners' breasts, and most women are happy with the size of their partners' genitals," Lehmiller said. "This tells us that a lot of people are worrying about their appearance for no good reason."

And remember, the brain is our biggest sex organ. It pays to worry less about the size of your belly, butt or breasts -- and redirect that attention to sexy talk, fantasies and other "brainy" activities instead! via cnn.com

Need one on one coaching or a speaker? Contact Jim to discuss how he can help you. 

Jim Woods is principal and founder of InnoThink Group. Jim is a business turnaround expert and personal coach. His story is riveting. He has worked with government, U.S. Army, MITRE Corporation, Pitney Bowes, Whirlpool, and 3M. Jim’s business experiences, extensive research on competitive strategy and innovation have given him a fresh perspective on improving individual and organizational performance. Jim is a prolific speaker on strategic innovation, creative leadership, uncertainty and competitive strategy. Speak with us for consulting or speaking engagements call 719-266-6703 or click here for more information. Follow Jim on Twitter. Follow Jim on Facebook.  

It's Not Them It's You. How To Develop Courage and Overcome "I Don't Deserve It" Patterns That Destroy

Faith is the catalyst of all belief. 

Healthy self-esteem means thinking as highly of yourself as you think of your friends and peers. We are so used to negative feedback that we are more aware of our weaknesses than our strengths. We are often taught we will "fail," so it is often hard to enjoy success, no matter how small each "success" might be. We are likewise taught that humility is thinking less of ourselves and more highly of others. 

Self esteem is believing one is worthy of happiness. 

 

 

Almost all negative thinking and depression are the result of low self esteem. This significantly impacts our career, relationships and health. When we are depressed we invariably believe we are worthless. The deeper the depression the greater the fatigue of hopelessness. Ultimately this transforms into self-dislike causing one to feel deficient in all the qualities we value such as: intelligence, achievement, popularity, attractiveness, health and strength. Until ones reality is frequented by tremendous weighted feelings that one is defeated, defective, deserted, unloved, unwanted, and deprived.  There is more to this in my seminars and coaching.

Try these steps for greater self esteem: 

1. Celebrate your strengths and achievements.
2. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
3. Don't dwell on your weaknesses; every human has them.
4. Change the way you talk to yourself--stop putting yourself down!
5. Be sure that you are not judging yourself against unreasonable standards.
6. Berating yourself for your weaknesses is self-defeating. Use that energy for positive thoughts about you.

People With High Self-Esteem Are:.

1. Accept and learn from thier own mistakes.
2. Confident without being obnoxious or conceited.
3. Not devastated by criticism.
4. Not overly defensive when questioned.
5. Not easily defeated by setbacks and obstacles.
6. Unlikely to feel a need to put others down.
7. Open and assertive in communicating their needs.
8. Not overly worried about failing or looking foolish.
9. Not harshly or destructively critical of themselves.
10. Not aggressively driven to prove themselves.
11. Able to laugh at themselves, not taking themselves too seriously.

 

Need one on one coaching or a speaker? Contact Jim to discuss how he can help you. 

Jim Woods is principal and founder of InnoThink Group. Jim is a business turnaround expert. His story is riveting. He has worked with government, U.S. Army, MITRE Corporation, Pitney Bowes, Whirlpool, and 3M. Jim’s business experiences, extensive research on competitive strategy and innovation have given him a fresh perspective on improving individual and organizational performance. Jim is a prolific speaker on strategic innovation, creative leadership, uncertainty and competitive strategy. Speak with us for consulting or speaking engagements call 719-266-6703 or click here for more information. Follow Jim on Twitter. Follow Jim on Facebook.  

 

 

Tags » How to be courageous How to overcome fear Jim Woods Jim Woods Motivational speaker and coach Life coach Personal coach self esteem

via excellenceininnovationblog.posterous.com

 

Dear leader: You’re in for one heck of a ride - Jim Woods Leadership and Strategy

With the exception of a few extremists, most of us don’t want to be in serious survival situations. Yet, in every respect, today’s businesses are in a battle for their lives. And things are going to get excruciatingly worse.  

 

Are you thinking you’ve seen enough? Well Buttercup buckle up! You aint seen nothing yet. It’s going to be cold, hard, bitter, and more weirder. So what? Meaning leadership is more important than ever. Still wondering so what? If you don’t get meaner, more remarkable at what you’re good at….your face will be on the back of milk cartons.

 

From now, on the new normal is going to force-feed leaders and managers a whacked out freaky business climate based strictly on unconventional wisdom. You are going to have to move hastily from creativity to innovation creating products that customers lust for. And you are going to sprint faster than &(%$ to deliver it.  

The ambitious companies with nimble strategies manage to hone skills, build stamina, and learn from the mistakes and fortunes of themselves and competitors. However, occasionally something remarkable develops. The really GREAT companies do well even in lean times because they hire leaders who do more than envision. They hire leaders and managers who execute.

How do you do it? By making the complex simple:

 

• Remove weak performers in every capacity.
• Be sure to place your own head on the chopping block first. You’re part of the reason for their ineptness.
• Significantly tighten control systems. Make products people will buy. And then find ways to make them better.

 

Well, reach for the heavy coat and the chicken soup…good luck and pass the butter. Because, you are going to need it more than you do today. 

 

Jim Woods is principal and founder of InnoThink Group. Jim is a business turnaround expert. His story is riveting. He has worked with government, U.S. Army, MITRE Corporation, Pitney Bowes, Whirlpool, and 3M. Jim’s business experiences, extensive research on competitive strategy and innovation have given him a fresh perspective on improving individual and organizational performance. Jim is a prolific speaker on strategic innovation, creative leadership, uncertainty and competitive strategy. Speak with us for consulting or speaking engagements call 719-266-6703 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting FREE 719-266-6703end_of_the_skype_highlighting or click here for more information. Follow Jim on Twitter. Follow Jim on Facebook.  

Tags » Business Denver Management Consulting Firms Economy Innovation Leadership

via excellenceininnovationblog.posterous.com

Try This 20-Minute Exercise To Eradicate Negative Thinking

After a flurry of emails in response to my blog post on passion, I reached a disheartening realization: Passion is useless if you don’t already believe.

You see, what we can achieve is limited by what we believe. Henry Ford knew this: “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right.”

So here I was, passionately committed to become the world-class business guru, best-selling author, the speaker who fills stadiums. And yet there was voice telling me, “You can’t do it. Keep trying, trying is fun, but in the end you will fail.”

You’ve probably heard that voice as well.

I’m making progress--my book sales are accelerating, my keynote audiences are growing, and I’m sharing the stage with people like Jack Welch and Robin Sharma--but in the back of my mind the voice pulls the reins: “You can’t do it.”

Great “outthinkers” seem to overcome this voice. Their belief matches their passion. Napoleon believed he was the greatest general of his time and so he was. Steve Jobs believed his people could achieve the impossible, so they did. Richard Branson believed he could win against British Airways, and so he won, even though every airline that tried over the prior three decades failed.

Belief is contagious. It wins supporters. It’s self-fulfilling. As Harvard professor Rosebeth Moss Kanter shows in her book Confidence, the belief you can win creates momentum which improves your chances of winning.

So what do you do when you don’t believe?

Over the past four weeks, I’ve studied books and articles, interviewed entrepreneurs and experts, then assembled it all for you in a simple framework with which you can systematically attack whatever belief is holding you down. Give me 20 minutes. This works.

Fundamentals

1. Beliefs aren’t real. They are mental maps, abstractions of reality, that help us predict a complex world. My son believes good batteries must be cold because I keep ours in the freezer. He believes Santa Claus rides a sleigh.

2. Four anchors form our beliefs (For more, read Why We Believe What We Believe by Andrew Newberg and Mark Robert Waldman).

• Evidence: Something happens (e.g., gifts appear one morning and my mom says they are from Santa Claus)
• Logic: It makes sense, more specifically, it is consistent with our other beliefs (e.g., gifts can’t just appear out of nowhere, my mom and dad were asleep...it must have been Santa)
• Emotion: Strong emotional associations (a 3-year-old’s joy at getting a new choo choo) embed beliefs more indelibly
• Social consensus: We believe more deeply if others believe too (e.g., Maria and Nico and Sofia all say Santa brought them gifts too)

 

3. We reject what doesn’t fit. Once a belief is formed, we explain away any inconsistent evidence. I saw a documentary in which a young child said to his friends, “Santa came to my house and ate a little bit of a cookie, then he went to Jack’s house and ate a little bit and drank some milk, then to Maria’s and ate some and then...So if he went to ALL of our houses in one night, it must mean--” You are sure he is about to realize Santa can’t be real, but instead he animates excitedly, “Santa must have been really hungry!”

4. Humans need consistency between beliefs, actions, and words. In Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, Robert Cialdini calls this “The Rule of Consistency." This is how beliefs hold us down or lift us up. If you believe you can’t, you start acting and speaking like someone who can’t, so you actually can’t. Interestingly, the relationship also works in reverse: Change your action or words and you can change your beliefs.

The Model

Over a 12-hour flight home from Paraguay, I assembled these principles into a model we can use to deconstruct and replace any belief that holds us down. It is simpler than it looks.

Imagine a hot air balloon being held down by four anchors. The balloon represents the belief holding you down and actions and words this belief influences.

The four anchors represent evidence, logic, emotion, and social consensus. To release the balloon you must replace the offending belief. Do this in five steps:

Step 1: Identify the belief.
Find a belief that is holding you down. Tip: Write down beliefs until you find one that hurts. In my case, “You don’t really have what it takes to be world-class author/speaker/thinker.”

Step 2: Identify the anchors.

• What evidence/events anchor the belief? (my books aren’t on the NYT best-seller list)
• What emotions anchor your belief? (I feel comfort because in not really trying, I know I can’t fail)
• Who around you reinforces this belief (social consensus)? (well-intentioned people who congratulate me on already having achieved the dream)
• What logic locks in this belief; what “dependent beliefs” fit? (wanting to fill a stadium is self-centered, thinking I can offer what people don’t already know is conceited)

Step 3: Pick a new belief.
What alternative belief would be consistent with someone who really achieves your dream? (I am destined to be a best-selling business thinker and speaker.)

 

Step 4: Release the anchors.

• Evidence: what alternative evidence supports this new belief? (people pay me lots of money to speak, I’m sharing the stage with some of the biggest business gurus)
• Emotions: what does it feel like to really live this new belief and fulfill your dream? (passion, purpose, having made an impact)
• Social consensus: who can you surround yourself with to support the new belief? (other business gurus and authors)
• Beliefs: how can you replace the “dependent beliefs” identified above? (this is not conceited because it’s about serving others; the best business gurus do it to serve others, not for their ego)

Step 5: Set your course.
Write down five specific things you will do (action) and say (words) that force you to live your new belief.

 

Completing this process took me 20 minutes and has put me fully in the game, committed and knowing I can win. Would that be worth your time?

Click here for a more detailed workbook. I will also invite you to a free webinar outlining this framework and add you to my newsletter. If you don’t find my newsletter valuable you can unsubscribe with one click.
 [Image: Flickr user Karen Blaha] via fastcompany.com

Jim Woods is about helping companies and people engage innovate and grow in all the areas important to them. Jim is a professional speaker, author, coach, and strategy consultant based in Colorado Springs, Co. Follow Jim on Twitter @innothinkgroup, Facebook https://www.facebook.com/InnoThink Group or check out his company website http://innothinkgroup.com for more tips and strategies effective leadership, engaged employees, increase growth, and customer effectiveness through innovation. To arrange for Jim to consult or speak at your event email Jim.

Why Leaders Fail - The Case for Effective Leadership - Mark Sanborn

Donald Trump, paragon of the real estate world, files for bankruptcy. Richard Nixon, 37th U.S. President, resigns the presidency over the Watergate scandal. Jennifer Capriati, rising tennis star, enters a rehabilitation center for drug addicts. Jim Bakker, renowned televangelist, is convicted of fraud.

In the recent past, we've witnessed the public downfall of leaders from almost every area of endeavor—business, politics, religion, and sports. One day they're on top of the heap, the next, the heap's on top of them.

Of course, we think that such catastrophic failure could never happen to us. We've worked hard to achieve our well-deserved positions of leadership—and we won't give them up for anything! The bad news is: the distance between beloved leader and despised failure is shorter than we think.

Ken Maupin, a practicing psychotherapist and colleague, has built his practice on working with high-performance personalities, including leaders in business, religion, and sports. Ken and I have often discussed why leaders fail. Our discussions have led to the following "warning signs" of impending failure.

WARNING SIGN #1: A Shift in Focus

This shift can occur in several ways. Often, leaders simply lose sight of what's important. The laser-like focus that catapulted them to the top disappears, and they become distracted by the trappings of leadership, such as wealth and notoriety.

Leaders are usually distinguished by their ability to "think big." But when their focus shifts, they suddenly start thinking small. They micro manage, they get caught up in details better left to others, they become consumed with the trivial and unimportant. And to make matters worse, this tendency can be exacerbated by an inclination toward perfectionism.

A more subtle leadership derailer is an obsession with "doing" rather than "becoming." The good work of leadership is usually a result of who the leader is. What the leader does then flows naturally from inner vision and character. It is possible for a leader to become too action oriented and, in the process, lose touch with the more important development of self.

What is your primary focus right now? If you can't write it on the back of your business card, then it's a sure bet that your leadership is suffering from a lack of clarity. Take the time necessary to get your focus back on what's important.

Further, would you describe your thinking as expansive or contractive? Of course, you always should be willing to do whatever it takes to get the job done, but try never to take on what others can do as well as you. In short, make sure that your focus is on leading rather than doing.

WARNING SIGN #2: Poor Communication

A lack of focus and its resulting disorientation typically lead to poor communication. Followers can't possibly understand a leader's intent when the leader him- or herself isn't sure what it is! And when leaders are unclear about their own purpose, they often hide their confusion and uncertainty in ambiguous communication.

Sometimes, leaders fall into the clairvoyance trap. In other words, they begin to believe that truly committed followers automatically sense their goals and know what they want without being told. Misunderstanding is seen by such managers as a lack of effort (or commitment) on the listener's part, rather than their own communication negligence.

"Say what you mean, and mean what you say" is timeless advice, but it must be preceded by knowing what you mean! An underlying clarity of purpose is the starting point for all effective communication. It's only when you're absolutely clear about what you want to convey that the hard work of communicating pays dividends.

WARNING SIGN #3: Risk Aversion

Third, leaders at risk often begin to be driven by a fear of failure rather than the desire to succeed. Past successes create pressure for leaders: "Will I be able to sustain outstanding performance?" "What will I do for an encore?" In fact, the longer a leader is successful, the higher his or her perceived cost of failure.

When driven by the fear of failure, leaders are unable to take reasonable risks. They want to do only the tried and proven; attempts at innovation—typically a key to their initial success—diminish and eventually disappear.

Which is more important to you: the attempt or the outcome? Are you still taking reasonable risks?  Prudent leadership never takes reckless chances that risk the destruction of what has been achieved, but neither is it paralyzed by fear. Often the dance of leadership is two steps forward, one step back.

WARNING SIGN #4: Ethics Slip

A leader's credibility is the result of two aspects:  what he or she does (competency) and who he or she is (character). A discrepancy between these two aspects creates an integrity problem.

The highest principle of leadership is integrity. When integrity ceases to be a leader's top priority, when a compromise of ethics is rationalized away as necessary for the "greater good," when achieving results becomes more important than the means to their achievement—that is the moment when a leader steps onto the slippery slop of failure.

Often such leaders see their followers as pawns, a mere means to an end, thus confusing manipulation with leadership. These leaders lose empathy. They cease to be people "perceivers" and become people "pleasers," using popularity to ease the guilt of lapsed integrity.

It is imperative to your leadership that you constantly subject your life and work to the highest scrutiny. Are there areas of conflict between what you believe and how you behave? Has compromise crept into your operational tool kit? One way to find out is to ask the people you depend on if they ever feel used or taken for granted.

WARNING SIGN #5: Poor Self Management

Tragically, if a leader doesn't take care of him- or herself, no one else will. Unless a leader is blessed to be surrounded by more-sensitive-than-normal followers, nobody will pick up on the signs of fatigue and stress. Leaders are often perceived to be superhuman, running on unlimited energy.

While leadership is invigorating, it is also tiring. Leaders who fail to take care of their physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual needs are headed for disaster. Think of having a gauge for each of these four areas of your life—and check them often! When a gauge reaches the "empty" point, make time for refreshment and replenishment. Clear your schedule and take care of yourself—it's absolutely vital to your leadership that you continue to grow and develop, a task that can be accomplished only when your tanks are full.

WARNING SIGN #6: Lost Love

The last warning sign of impending disaster that leaders need to heed is a move away from their first love and dream. Paradoxically, the hard work of leadership should be fulfilling and even fun. But when leaders lose sight of the dream that compelled them to accept the responsibility of leadership, they can find themselves working for causes that mean little to them. They must stick to what they love, what motivated them at the first, to maintain the fulfillment of leadership.

To make sure that you stay on the track of following your first love, frequently ask yourself these three questions: Why did I initially assume leadership? Have those reasons changed? Do I still want to lead?

The warning signs in life—from stop lights to prescription labels—are there for our good. They protect us from disaster, and we would be foolish to ignore them. As you consider the six warning signs of leadership failure, don't be afraid to take an honest look at yourself. If any of the warnings ring true, take action today! The good news is: by paying attention to these signs and heeding their warnings, you can avoid disaster and sustain the kind of leadership that is healthy and fulfilling for both yourself and your followers. via leadershipnow.com

Jim Woods is about helping companies and people engage innovate and grow in all the areas important to them. Jim is a professional speaker, author, coach, and strategy consultant based in Colorado Springs, Co. Follow Jim on Twitter @innothinkgroup, Facebook https://www.facebook.com/InnoThink Group or check out his company website http://innothinkgroup.com for more tips and strategies effective leadership, engaged employees, increase growth, and customer effectiveness through innovation. To arrange for Jim to consult or speak at your event email Jim.

To Find Your Infinite Possibilities - Sprout Some Wings - Jim Woods

Brother Lawrence, the 17th-century Christian monk, was asked how he’d been able to maintain such a heightened state of awareness of his oneness with God. He replied, “I gave up all that was not he [meaning God] and I began to live in the world as if only he and I existed. As if only God and I existed.” He could say this because he was consciously choosing to live in such a way, and he exerted the spiritual discipline to enter that state of consciousness, a consciousness of oneness with God. Court that kind of awakening in your own life. Know that it is possible to live in this world as if only God exists, because it’s true. God exists as you. God exists as the people around you. God exists as opportunities that open up for you. You can choose not to see anything other than this. Let it speak to you throughout your day, then it will be present in your dream stage, it will pour out through your poetry, your song, your dance, your every movement.

As the Buddha described, once you hear the truth, it’s not going to go away. You’ve heard the truth and, one way or another, at one time or another, you will fully awaken to the awareness that your life is the life of the divine, that you are already an enlightened being.

You may resist this truth, you may deny it for a while, but it’s going to keep working on you, keep revolving within you, just as it is in this very moment, whether you are aware of it or not. Whatever has brought you to the point of awareness in which you find yourself today is the same thing that seeks to express itself in, through, and as you fully and completely. It’s emerging now, and soon you will sprout some wings and fly into the undiscovered region of your infinite potential.

Breathe into that awareness, feeling yourself connected to and blessed by it. The grace of God is pouring over you. Sometimes we don’t even know how blessed we are. There are blessings happening in your life that you don’t even know about yet.

Sometimes blessings come disguised and we say, “Oh no! I don’t want that! That isn’t what I’ve been praying for!” But right within that disguised blessing is something our soul is prepared to welcome or it wouldn’t have arrived at the threshold of our life, of our awareness.

So begin to count not only the blessings you can see, of which you are aware, but also give thanks for those you can’t yet see. Say to yourself, “My life is magnificent in every way—the good, the harmony, the love, the creativity, the joy, the harmony—are beyond my imagining! I am so humbly grateful for life, and to Life itself!”

This is your life on God. This is your brain on love. This is your mind on peace. This is your being on creativity. This is your body temple on vibrant health. All of this and more is who and what you are. via  Heal Your Life

 

Jim Woods is about helping companies and people engage innovate and grow in all the areas important to them. Jim is a professional speaker, author, coach, and strategy consultant based in Colorado Springs, Co. Follow Jim on Twitter @innothinkgroup, Facebook https://www.facebook.com/InnoThink Group or check out his company website http://innothinkgroup.com for more tips and strategies effective leadership, engaged employees, increase growth, and customer effectiveness through innovation. To arrange for Jim to consult or speak at your event email Jim.

 

Lessons on leadership from General David Petraeus - Rules for Living - Paula Broadwell

My two cents : While there is something ironic about this centered leadership lesson from both the subject and the author, two facts remain. 1. Principles are timeless. 2. There is no such thing as a minor lapse in integrity. Jim 

via Paul Broadwell and The Daily Beast

1. Lead by example from the front of the formation. Take your performance personally—if you are proud to be average, so too will be your troops.

Pete Marovich / ZUMA Press

2. A leader must provide a vision—clear and achievable “big ideas” combined in a strategic concept—and communicate those ideas throughout the entire organi­zation and to all other stakeholders.

3. A leader needs to give energy; don’t be an oxygen thief.

4. There is an exception to every rule, standard operating procedure, and poli­cy; it is up to leaders to determine when exceptions should be made and to ex­plain why they made them.

5. We all will make mistakes. The key is to recognize them and admit them, to learn from them, and to take off the rear­ view mirrors—drive on and avoid making them again.

6. Be humble. The people you’ll be lead­ing already have on-the-ground conflict experience. “Listen and learn.”

7. Be a team player. “Your team’s triumphs and failures will, obviously, be yours.” Take ownership of both.

8. Don’t rely on rank. If you rely on rank, rather than on the persuasiveness of your logic, the problem could be you and either your thinking or your com­munication skills. Likewise, sometimes the best ideas come from bottom-up information sharing (i.e., “Need to share” not “Need to know”). Use “direct­ed telescopes” to improve situational awareness.

9. Leaders should be thoughtful but deci­sive. Listen to subordinates’ input, evaluate courses of action and second- and third-order effects, but be OK with an “80 per­cent solution.” “There will be many moments when all eyes turn to you for a decision. Be prepared for them. Don’t shrink from them. Embrace them.” Some­times the best move is the bold move.

10. Stay fit to fight. Your body is your ulti­mate weapons system. Physical fitness for your body is essential for mental fitness.

11. The only thing better than a little com­petition is a lot of competition. Set chal­lenges for your subordinates to encourage them to excel.

12. Everyone on the team is mission criti­cal. Instill in your team members a sense of great self-worth—that each, at any given time, can be the most important on the battlefield. via thedailybeast.com

Jim Woods is about helping companies and pople engage innovate and grow in all the areas important to them. Jim is a professional speaker, author, coach, and strategy consultant based in Colorado Springs, Co. Follow Jim on Twitter @innothinkgroup, Facebook https://www.facebook.com/InnoThink Group or check out his company website http://innothinkgroup.com for more tips and strategies effective leadership, engaged employees, increase growth, and customer effectiveness through innovation. To arrange for Jim to consult or speak at your event email Jim.

How Apple, Samsung and Google Take Different Approaches to Innovation - Max Nisen

image credit: Business Insider

When people think of the most innovative companies, they think of ones that are coming out with new and amazing technology. The push for self-driving cars or augmented reality glasses can be a more compelling story than, say, a smaller iPad.

But one thing highlighted in the Booz & Co. Innovation 1000 study and our conversation with co-author Barry Jaruzelski is that pushing technological boundaries is just one of the three successful paths to innovation. Each is as difficult to execute, requires as much innovation in the research and development (R&D) process, and has as much potential as the next.

Here's how Jaruzelski describes them: 

1. Need seekers (think Apple)

"...these are companies who's innovation strategy is essentially around knowing customers better than themselves, identifying unarticulated needs, and then being the first to market with a product that addresses those needs. It's very heavily reliant on direct customer observation rather than market research. It is people telling you what they want, watching customers, seeing how they interact with the product or competitors' products, and observing opportunities in the problems that they're having."

Apple didn't invent the touch screen. But it's made vastly more money than anyone else on it by focusing on how people use it, and being better than anyone else at delivering that experience.

2. Market readers (think Samsung)

"...a market reader is sort of the classic fast follower, it doesn't mean they ignore their customers, but they're very attuned to what competitors are doing and what other people are bringing to market first and observing what seems to be gaining traction, then very rapidly coming up with their own version of that innovation. You can think about the companies set up as almost a massive coiled spring to basically pop out and copy an idea, not reverse engineer it necessarily, but, looking at innovation and coming up with their own version very rapidly to get their share. It's very much rooted in competitive intelligence, classic market research kinds of activities in terms of the front end."

Samsung wouldn't have jumped five spots in three years on the ranking of the world's most innovative companies delivering bad copies of an iPhone. It creates compelling new versions of products, times them well, and adds to them. Pulling that off is an innovative and difficult strategy in its own right. 

3. Tech drivers (think Google)

"The third category is what we call technology drivers. This is much more the traditional technology push kind of model, where the pendulum hasn't swung completely away from customers and markets, but it's much more oriented towards leveraging the technology base, seeing what you can push out, seeing where there might be applications for the technology."

This is the model that's traditionally defined innovation, but being the first to come up with something and the best at making money off of it are very different.

Every company listed here is successful and approaches R&D in a completely different way. The narrative that calls only the last group innovative may be appealing, but it's not what investors or R&D executives care about.

This story originally appeared on Business Insider

via entrepreneur.com

We’re about helping companies of all sizes grow. Follow me on Twitter @innothinkgroup, Facebook https://www.facebook.com/pages/Center-for-Creative-Leadership-and-Strategy, or check out my website http://innothinkgroup.com for more tips and strategies effective leadership, engaged employees, increase growth, and customer effectiveness through innovation. To consult or speak at your event email me.