Personal Development: Learn How To Overcome Adversity In Less Than 30 Seconds.

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Relationship Therapy: 50 SHADES OF GREY - MEN'S VERSION

50 SHADES OF GRAY?Four guys have been going to the same fishing trip for many years.
Two days before the group is to leave, Ron's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.

Ron's mates are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do.
Two days later the three get to the camping site to find Ron sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and dinner cooking on the fire, sitting having a cold beer.
"Shit Ron, how long you been here, and how did you talk your missus into letting you go?"
"Well, I've been here since last night.
Yesterday evening, I was sitting in my living room chair and my wife came up behind me and put her hands over my eyes and asked, 'Guess who?"
I pulled her hands off, and there she was, wearing a nightie.
She took my hand and pulled me into our bedroom. The room had candles and rose petals all over.
Well she's been reading 50 Shades of Grey......
On the bed she had handcuffs, and ropes! She told me to tie her up and cuff her to the bed, so I did.
And then she said, "Do whatever you want."So, Here I am!

via my friend Kenton Pass.

How To Unleash Blessings In Your Life and Others

 

This is an amazing time to be alive. We are blessed with so very much. Believing this can be difficult. It is sometimes difficult to view the problems and despair around us and not become discouraged. I have found that, rather than dwelling on the negative, if we will take a step back and consider the blessings in our lives, including seemingly small, sometimes overlooked blessings, we can find greater happiness. 

In reviewing my life, I have made some discoveries. One is that countless experiences I have had were not necessarily those one would consider extraordinary. In fact, at the time they transpired they often seemed unremarkable and even ordinary as ordinary could be. And yet, in retrospect, they enriched and blessed lives not the least of which was my own. In your life you have been thrust into undeserved circumstances and maladies. You have cherished life and others. You have been faithful. Perhaps you lost a cherished job or divorced after expending your best efforts. Hear this; your best days are before you. Someone somewhere wants you right now. You are a miracle to so many people. 

I would recommend this same exercise to you that you take an inventory of your life and look specifically for the blessings, large and small, you have received.

Tell me how you're feeling. If you've been helped by this article please leave a comment that can help others or repost to Facebook or Twitter. Thank you. Jim 

This Video Will Open Your Eyes - What Life Would You Live If Money Were No Object?

What would you like to do if money were no object? How would your life change if you lost weight? What if you won your battle over depression? What if you appreciated the love of your life more? You can! I'll help you. Contact me after you've watched this short video. I'll be with you every step of the way. Jim 

 

20 Gentle Quotations from Mister Rogers

In times of tragedy, we look to teachers for guidance and hope. I can think of no better teacher than Fred McFeely Rogers, better known to us as Mister Rogers–our friendly neighbor–for his gentle wisdom on children, humility, grief, and the specialness of every person. Many of these quotations are collected in the posthumous volume The World According to Mister Rogers, though they come from various sources, including his many television appearances.

1. On Heroes Without Capes

“When I was very young, most of my childhood heroes wore capes, flew through the air, or picked up buildings with one arm. They were spectacular and got a lot of attention. But as I grew, my heroes changed, so that now I can honestly say that anyone who does anything to help a child is a hero to me.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 501-503).

2. On Sharing Responsibility

“We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It’s easy to say, ‘It’s not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.’ Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes.”
Spoken in 1994, quoted in his obituary in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

3. From a PSA Following September 11, 2001

If you grew up with our Neighborhood, you may remember how we sometimes talked about difficult things. There were days … even beautiful days … that weren’t happy. In fact, there were some that were really sad.
Well, we’ve had a lot of days like that in our whole world. We’ve seen what some people do when they don’t know anything else to do with their anger.
I’m convinced that when we help our children find healthy ways of dealing with their feelings–ways that don’t hurt them or anyone else–we’re helping to make our world a safer, better place.
I would like to tell you what I often told you when you were much younger: I like you just the way you are.
And what’s more, I’m so grateful to you for helping the children in your life to know that you’ll do everything you can to keep them safe and to help them express their feelings in ways that will bring healing in many different neighborhoods.

Also, regarding the anniversary of the attacks: “[Children] don’t understand what an anniversary is, and if they see the tragedy replayed on television, they might think it’s happening at that moment.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 596-606) and as quoted in his obituary.

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4. On What We Do

“What matters isn’t how a person’s inner life finally puts together the alphabet and numbers of his outer life. What really matters is whether he uses the alphabet for the declaration of a war or the description of a sunrise–his numbers for the final count at Buchenwald or the specifics of a brand-new bridge.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 621-623).

5. On Looking for the Helpers

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of ‘disaster,’ I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers–so many caring people in this world.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 645-647).

6. On Helping

“I hope you’re proud of yourself for the times you’ve said ‘yes,’ when all it meant was extra work for you and was seemingly helpful only to somebody else.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 390-391).

7. On Pain

“There is no normal life that is free of pain. It’s the very wrestling with our problems that can be the impetus for our growth.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Location 389).

8. On Accepting Our Feelings

“There’s no ‘should’ or ‘should not’ when it comes to having feelings. They’re part of who we are and their origins are beyond our control. When we can believe that, we may find it easier to make constructive choices about what to do with those feelings.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 131-133).

9. On “Disabilities”

“Part of the problem with the word disabilities is that it immediately suggests an inability to see or hear or walk or do other things that many of us take for granted. But what of people who can’t feel? Or talk about their feelings? Or manage their feelings in constructive ways? What of people who aren’t able to form close and strong relationships? And people who cannot find fulfillment in their lives, or those who have lost hope, who live in disappointment and bitterness and find in life no joy, no love? These, it seems to me, are the real disabilities.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 142-146).

From Koko.org

10. On Facing Sadness and Anger

“Confronting our feelings and giving them appropriate expression always takes strength, not weakness. It takes strength to acknowledge our anger, and sometimes more strength yet to curb the aggressive urges anger may bring and to channel them into nonviolent outlets. It takes strength to face our sadness and to grieve and to let our grief and our anger flow in tears when they need to. It takes strength to talk about our feelings and to reach out for help and comfort when we need it.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 111-114).

11. On Love

“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Location 214).

12. On Humanity’s Intrinsic Value

“As human beings, our job in life is to help people realize how rare and valuable each one of us really is, that each of us has something that no one else has–or ever will have–something inside that is unique to all time. It’s our job to encourage each other to discover that uniqueness and to provide ways of developing its expression.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 463-465).

14. On American History

“A high school student wrote to ask, ‘What was the greatest event in American history?’ I can’t say. However, I suspect that like so many ‘great’ events, it was something very simple and very quiet with little or no fanfare (such as someone forgiving someone else for a deep hurt that eventually changed the course of history). The really important ‘great’ things are never center stage of life’s dramas; they’re always ‘in the wings.’ That’s why it’s so essential for us to be mindful of the humble and the deep rather than the flashy and the superficial.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 496-500).

15. On Life Not Being Cheap

In February of 1999, Fred Rogers was inducted into the Television Hall of Fame. This is an excerpt from his speech (emphasis added).

Fame is a four-letter word; and like tape or zoom or face or pain or life or love, what ultimately matters is what we do with it.
I feel that those of us in television are chosen to be servants. It doesn’t matter what our particular job, we are chosen to help meet the deeper needs of those who watch and listen–day and night!
The conductor of the orchestra at the Hollywood Bowl grew up in a family that had little interest in music, but he often tells people he found his early inspiration from the fine musicians on television.
Last month a thirteen-year-old boy abducted an eight-year-old girl; and when people asked him why, he said he learned about it on TV. ‘Something different to try,’ he said. ‘Life’s cheap; what does it matter?’
Well, life isn’t cheap. It’s the greatest mystery of any millennium, and television needs to do all it can to broadcast that … to show and tell what the good in life is all about.
But how do we make goodness attractive? By doing whatever we can do to bring courage to those whose lives move near our own–by treating our ‘neighbor’ at least as well as we treat ourselves and allowing that to inform everything that we produce.
Who in your life has been such a servant to you … who has helped you love the good that grows within you? Let’s just take ten seconds to think of some of those people who have loved us and wanted what was best for us in life–those who have encouraged us to become who we are tonight–just ten seconds of silence.
[Ten seconds elapse.]
No matter where they are–either here or in heaven–imagine how pleased those people must be to know that you thought of them right now.
We all have only one life to live on earth. And through television, we have the choice of encouraging others to demean this life or to cherish it in creative, imaginative ways.

From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Locations 540-558).

16. On Peace

“Peace means far more than the opposite of war!”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Location 613).

17. On Solitude

“Solitude is different from loneliness, and it doesn’t have to be a lonely kind of thing.”
From The World According to Mister Rogers (Kindle Location 158).
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Merry Valentine - The secret to desire in a long-term relationship - Video

Before you dismiss this video as only a Valentines Day diatribe or fodder for momentary foreplay, bear in mind, Esther masterfully delves into human behavior. What makes us ultimately happy? What propels us to be hunters and gatherers. Because, in the end, there is a reason we work and marry. Watch this with a loved if possible. By the way, her comment on foreplay has a customer experience connection as well. No, seriously. Jim

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Hello, I love You. Portrait of love: Man teaches girlfriend to read after stroke

How "I AM" Words Determine Your Destiny - Oprah's Lifeclass With Joel Osteen

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My 23 Best Viktor Frankl Life's Purpose Quotes

1. “The meaning of our existence is not invented by ourselves, but rather detected.” 
2.  “It is the very pursuit of happiness that thwarts happiness.”
3.  “Being tolerant does not mean that I share another one’s belief. But it does mean that I acknowledge another one’s right to believe, and obey, his own conscience.”
4.  “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
5.  “Man does not simply exist, but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become in the next moment.”
6.  “Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality.”
7.  “A human being is a deciding being.”
8. “What is to give light must endure burning.”
9.  “Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”
10.  “Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather must recognize that it is he who is asked. In a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible.”
11.  “Each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible.”
12.  “What man actually needs is not a tensionless state but rather the striving and struggling for some goal worthy of him. What he needs is not the discharge of tension at any cost, but the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him.”
13. “What is to give light must endure burning.” 
14. “Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”
15. “For the meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day and from hour to hour. What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment.”
16.  “A man who becomes conscious of the responsibility he bears toward a human being who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life. He knows the “why” for his existence, and will be able to bear almost any “how.”
17.  “Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life… Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated. Thus, everyone’s task is as unique as is his specific opportunity to implement it.”
18.  “The existential vacuum manifests itself mainly in a state of boredom.”
19.  “We can discover this meaning in life in three different ways: 1. By doing a deed; 2. By experiencing a value; and 3. By suffering.”
20.  “We must never forget that we may also find meaning in life even when confronted with a hopeless situation, when facing a fate that cannot be changed. For what then matters is to bear witness to the uniquely human potential at its best, which is to transform a personal tragedy into a triumph, to turn one’s predicament into a human achievement. When we are no longer able to change a situation–just think of an incurable disease such as inoperable cancer–we are challenged to change ourselves.”
21.  “Life can be pulled by goals just as surely as it can be pushed by drives.”
22.  “The last of the human freedoms is to choose one’s attitudes”
23.  “Ever more people today have the means to live, but no meaning to live for.” 

 Jim Woods is a strategy consultant and President at InnoThink Group Consultants. For more ideas and to read about Jim's speaking and consulting engagements click here. 

You'll love this video - Relax Life is Best When Simple: Best Friends - a kid, a dog and a puddle

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Unbelievable TED Talk By John Wooden: People Development and The Difference Between Winning and Succeeding

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If you were arm less how much more would you be? Watch this!

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Think You're Too Old To Start Something New? Watch This 101 Year Old Marathoner.

Josiah Schlatter

Say goodbye to our very old friend Fauja Singh, the 101-year-old marathon man dubbed the “Turbaned Tornado” who gave us 12 years of incredibly slow but consistent inspiration. He’s finally admitted that age has caught up to him and he will retire from competitive running after the Hong Kong Marathon on February 24th.

This doesn’t mean he’s going to stop running, though. Oh no. Far from it. Says Singh: “Running is my life. I will keep running to inspire the masses. I will keep running for at least four hours daily after that.”

You go, Singh. You just inspired me to turn on the light in my room so I can see my keyboard. And maybe I’ll put on pants after this post.

Singh started running at 89 years of age and is an example that willpower can take you to some pretty crazy places in life. I bet if Singh watched Forrest Gump he’d just nod his head in understanding.

Recently, Singh ran the Toronto Waterfront Marathon in eight hours, 25 minutes, finishing in 3,850th place, ahead of five other competitors who wish to never speak of that day ever again.

Singh also included the key to a long and happy life. Here it is.

“The reason for my good health is that I exercise daily and follow a proper diet regime,” he was quoted as saying. “I take happiness in biggest proportions though my actual diet is very small.

“Nowadays, people are more interested in going to a gym, but I feel that if they exercise regularly on their own they can be physically and mentally strong.

“Daily exercise will keep you away from all diseases.”

Also remember: Nothing lasts forever except for the Rolling Stones.

Via Josiah Schlatter Off The Bench

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Searching for more inspiration and techniques to overcome what's been holding you back? Click here. 

 

Sex, Intimacy, Fulfillment and Peace - Giving Up On Life? Watch This - The Beauty of Aging

There's a mythical age past which women and men are supposedly headed downhill. But the extraordinary women in the documentary “The Beauty of Aging” are so engaged in their activities, curiosity, creativity, and wisdom they're redefining old age. As part of the fastest growing population in America, these women forge a new trail for others. Watch this video by filmmaker Laurie Schur. You'll discover passion is ageless.

 

Current research on aging tells us that seeing positive images is good for our health and that optimism contributes to our longevity. The women in The Beauty of Aging Documentary Project are exciting examples of this new research. They show us through their creativity, sense of purpose and fearlessness, how to stay engaged in living. The operative words are purpose and gratitude. Jim

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Can You Stop for a Minute? - Iyanla Vanzant - Heal Your Life

I knew how to take a punch in life, and I was determined not to be knocked down. A lot of people get turned on by the dramatic frenzy of running here and there, trying to find this or that in order to get something or learn something else at the last possible moment. Life does not have to be hard!

There was a time in my own life when I had a tendency to make my life experience much harder than was required or necessary. In fact, the “last minute” was my drug of choice. Then, as I matured and my memory ceased to be as cooperative as it had once been, I had to abandon the “last minute” and focus on where I had put my glasses!

Now I watch in total amazement as the young women around me, drama queens and divas, push the envelope of the important things in their lives to 15 minutes after they are due. What I know now is that making life harder than it needs to be does not make you more valuable, worthy, or stronger. In fact, it gives you wrinkles!

One of my favorite Bible verses is Proverbs 3:5-6 which says: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take” (New Living Translation).

I consider this the absolute mandate for blessing your head daily. Understanding that it is not the physical head we are addressing, but rather the spiritual head, or consciousness, this proverb clearly indicates that if we want to know what to do, we must honor the Creator of our head. If we want to know how to do it, we must seek guidance and direction. We must be obedient to our inner voice, and we must stop believing that we are out here in the world alone.

There have been many times in my life when I have been totally lost and confused but would not admit it. I thought my life had to be hard; after all, I was ugly and bad. Because I had watched the adults in my life do it with such finesse, I believed that struggle was necessary for the development of an all-around personality. I tell you, I really knew how to struggle! I struggled to make ends meet. I struggled to raise my children, attempting to teach them how not to struggle.

I struggled through one relationship after another, one bad relationship after another. I struggled to manage my life rather than live it. It felt as though I had been beaten up so badly, and for so long, in life and by life, that I believed struggle, hurt, and pain were the natural order. I knew how to take a punch in life, and I was determined not to be knocked down even when I was on my knees, crawling, with my tongue hanging out. I would survive!

I now realize that just because you can take a punch does not mean you must stand in front of a fist, particularly not when the fist is your own. It is like self-flagellation! With my extremely negative internal self-dialogue, I would beat myself up for who and what I was and was not, what I had and had not done, what I did and did not own. Externally, I tried to prove to myself and the world that I was more than I actually believed I could ever be. It was crazy-making behavior, and I was doing it to myself. I had a very limited perception of reality and myself based on the many things I had been told during childhood. I had also created enough drama on my own to make my life a hotbed of difficulty.

If you live long enough, life will humble you. Life will level your defenses, expose your bad habits, and reveal self-deception, all in an attempt to push you beyond your self-inflicted nonsense and self-imposed unworthiness. When you are paying attention, you will get the point. When you are not, you will be humbled. Life can and will bring you to the stark realization that your thinking and feeling nature—in essence, your level of consciousness— controls what you can and cannot do or be.

Rev. Iyanla Vanzant is an internationally renowned inspirational speaker, the founder and Executive Director of the Inner Visions Spiritual Life Maintenance Network.

 

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75 Daily Happiness Quotes to Overcome Fear and Depression

 

Here are 75 happiness quotes to brighten your day and move your mindset in a positive direction.

1. Smile every chance you get.  Not because life has been easy, perfect, or exactly as you had anticipated, but because you choose to be happy and grateful for all the good things you do have and all the problems you know you don’t have.
2. Never let a bad day make you feel like you have a bad life.
3. Tell the negativity committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up.  (Read Learned Optimism.)
4. A bad attitude is like a flat tire, you can’t get very far until you change it.
5. In a world where you can be anything you want, BE YOURSELF.
6. The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them.
7. It’s important to make someone happy, and it’s important to start with yourself.
8. Life is not about making others happy.  Life is about sharing your happiness with others.
9. Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something  you design into the present.
10. If you settle for just anything, you’ll never know what you’re truly worthy of.
11. Sometimes life gives you two options: losing yourself or losing someone else.  Regardless of the situation, don’t lose yourself.
12. If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, you do have a pretty big problem.
13. Whatever someone did to you in the past has no power over the present.  Only you give it power.
14. Don’t worry too much about people who don’t worry about you.
15. Know your worth!  When you give yourself to someone who doesn’t respect you, you surrender pieces of your soul that you’ll never get back.
16. Sometimes you’ve got to emotionally let go of the things that once meant a lot to you, so you can move beyond the past and the pains they bring you, and open the next chapter in your life.
17. If you want to get over a problem, stop mulling it over and talking about it.  Your mind affects your mouth, and your mouth affects your mind.  It’s nearly impossible to move beyond something when you’re obsessing over it.
18. If it is detrimental to you emotionally, physically and spiritually, what choice do you have but to let go and flourish with self-respect.
19. Saying goodbye is one of the most painful ways to solve a problem.  But sometimes it’s necessary.
20. Moving on doesn’t mean forgetting, it means you choose happiness over hurt.
21. Stop looking at what you have lost, so you can see what you have.
22. Someone else is happy with far less than what you have.
23. Talk about your blessings more than you talk about your problems.
24. Sometimes people throw away something good for something better, only to find out later that good was actually good enough and better never even came close.
25. In life, you get what you put in.  Everything comes back around.
26. You can never change the past nor control the future, but you can change the mood of the day by touching someone’s heart with your smile.
27. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.
28. Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.
29. It’s nice to have money and the things that money can buy, but it’s also important to make sure you haven’t lost track of the things that money can’t buy.
30. You don’t need a lot of money to lead a rich life.  Good friends and a loving family are worth their weight in gold.
31. You will never fully believe in yourself if you keep comparing yourself to everyone else.  Instead, compare yourself to who you were yesterday.  (Read Authentic Happiness.)
32. You won’t always be punished FOR your anger, but you will always be punished BY your anger.
33. Give yourself permission to immediately walk away from anything that gives you bad vibes.  There is no need to explain or make sense of it.  Just trust what you feel.
34. One of the greatest freedoms is truly not caring what everyone else thinks of you.
35. As long as you are worried about what others think of you, you are owned by them.  Only when you require no approval from outside yourself can you own yourself.
36. Don’t let anyone walk through your mind with their dirty feet.
37. It hurts the most when you start pretending it doesn’t.
38. You are responsible for how you feel no matter what someone does to you. Remember, you are always in control of your thoughts so choose to feel confident and adequate rather than angry and insecure.
39. Being kind to yourself in thoughts, words and actions is as important as being kind to others.
40. Death is not the greatest loss in life; the greatest loss is what dies inside while you’re still alive.
41. Only when we begin to be awake do we realize just how asleep we have been.
42. You are always free to do something that makes you smile.
43. You define your own life.  Don’t let other people write your life’s story for you.
44. Don’t be afraid of change.  Oftentimes you will lose something good, and then gain something even better.
45. Worry is a massive waste of time and energy.  It doesn’t change anything.  All it does is steal your joy and hinder your ability to make positive changes.
46. If you want to be happy and bright, let go of your need to always be right.
47. In life, you usually get what you ask for and it rarely comes in the package you think it’s supposed to come in.
48. If you don’t like something, change it.  If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.
49. Life does NOT have to be perfect to be wonderful.
50. You look the best when you wear your smile.  There is no beauty like the one that comes from inside you.
51. Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness.
52. The time spent on hating is the time lost for living a peaceful, happy life.  It is a habit that controls what you see, what you say, what you do, and ultimately what you become.
53. Sometimes you need to be alone to reflect on life.  Take time out to take care of yourself.  You deserve it.
54. The good things we build end up building us.
55. You cannot change what you refuse to confront.
56. The difference between who you are and who you want to be, is what you do.
57. If you want your life to change, your choices and actions must change.  Every day brings a chance to start over.
58. Good things don’t come to those who wait.  Good things come to those who pursue the goals and dreams they believe in.
59. Don’t make a decision based solely on popularity. Just because other people are doing it doesn’t mean it’s the best choice for you.
60. Following all the rules leaves a completed checklist.  Following your heart achieves a completed you.  (Read The Happiness Project.)
61. Knowing yourself is one thing, but truly believing and living as yourself is another.  With so much social conditioning in our society, we sometimes forget who we are.  Don’t lose yourself out there.
62. Of all the things that can be stolen from you – your possessions, your youth, your health, your words, your rights – what no one can ever take from you is your freedom to choose what you will believe in, and who and what your heart will love.
63. When you find yourself cocooned in isolation and despair and cannot find your way out of the darkness, remember that this is similar to the place where caterpillars go to grow their wings.
64. Take all the time you need to heal emotionally.  Moving on doesn’t take a day; it takes lots of little steps to be able to break free of your broken self.
65. When you can forgive, yourself and others, and stop the imprisonment, you’re creating the love of your life.
66. What you believe has more power than what you dream or wish or hope for.  You become what you believe.
67. Keep your heart open to dreams.  For as long as there’s a dream, there is hope, and as long as there is hope, there is joy in living.
68. When you try to control everything, you enjoy nothing.  Sometimes you just need to relax, breathe, let go, and just live in the moment.
69. Even though you cannot control everything that happens, you can control your attitude toward what happens.  And in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.
70. Life will never be perfect, no matter how hard you try.  Even if you pour your heart and soul into it, you will never have that perfection you seek.  There will always be broken hearts, there will always be days where nothing goes right.  But you must accept and learn that even the most imperfect things will always be made better with love and laughter.  (Read Stumbling on Happiness.)
71. Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.
72. Satisfaction is not always the fulfillment of what you want; it is the realization of how blessed you are for what you have.
73. Sometimes you just have to look back at your past and smile about how far you’ve come.
74. Just because it didn’t last forever, doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth your while.
75. It’s not that everything will be easy or exactly as you had expected, but you must just choose to be grateful for all that you have, and happy that you got a chance to live this life, no matter how it turns out. via marcandangel.com

Hire Jim Woods to Speak at Your Event

As a respected business thought leader and performance coach, Jim has spoken to small business as well as Fortune 500 firms. His clients have included government, education, software companies, the military, financial institutions, and start ups. Request availability and fees. Read Jim’s Bio.

Create an Exceptional Life - Louise Hay and Cheryl Richardson

For many years one of my affirmations has been: Only good lies before me. It is a comforting thought that wipes out all fear of the future and allows me to wake up each day with confidence, feeling at ease. I am often delighted and even amazed to observe how Life brings my next good adventure to me.

That is how I felt when I heard that Reid Tracy, the CEO of Hay House, was cooking up a scheme to have Cheryl Richardson and me produce a book together. A huge smile lit up my face as the idea penetrated my consciousness with possibilities. 

At first, I had many questions: What would we write about? How would we blend our two styles? Since we live so far apart, would Life give us enough together time? But soon I realized that Life could not have come up with such a good idea without covering all the bases. And cover the bases it did. Cheryl and I found ourselves in various cities, both here and abroad, with the perfect amount of time to lay out the next chapter or two. And when we weren’t together, we would Skype—often in our pajamas, with our hair and makeup au naturel—and it was as if we were in the same room. 

Cheryl and I have both made phenomenally positive changes in our lives, and we want to share what we’ve learned with you. All of us can improve the quality of our lives if we practice the art of self-care and train our minds to think thoughts that make us feel good. When we do, we attract delightful experiences that enrich our lives. 

The idea Cheryl and I had was to present these methods in the easiest possible way so that you could, step-by-step, learn how to have peace of mind—to live worry free in a healthy body, with a comfortable income, while enjoying your relationships. Ultimately, we wanted to show you how to move from feeling like a victim to being the creator of an enjoyable life. 

As you read our new book, You Can Create an Exceptional Life, chapter by chapter, you will notice your shoulders relaxing, your brow lines smoothing out, and your tension and fearfulness dissolving as you realize that there is a better way to live. 

It is the journey that brings pleasure, not the race to a destination. We love you and support you as you move with us on this great new adventure toward an exceptional life! 

Let’s affirm: Only good lies before me. I can create an exceptional life.

Read More via healyourlife.com 

SPEAKING ENGAGEMENTS

Jim has given speeches to lots of different audiences—associations, businesses, and nonprofits. If you're interested in having Jim speak to your group, just send us a note about the event (date, location, audience, etc.): speaking@innothinkgroup.com  Read Jim’s bio here. Read More

 

Prepare to be amazed by “People are Awesome 2013” [video] Inspirational

Great promotional video from the UK band Hadouken. This will inspire you.  

The song is 'Levitate' by Hadouken, out now on iTunes:http://bit.ly/WJxu0y
It is taken from the album 'Every Weekend' available on iTunes:http://bit.ly/W0U745
You can also order signed copies of the album and merch bundles at http://bit.ly/W7zm3Q
UK Tour on sale now http://bit.ly/S4MLMH

Check more ideas from Jim at www.innothinkgroup.com 

via excellenceininnovationblog.posterous.com

 

How A Small Business Can Innovate Fast

72% of employees detest their jobs. Here is how to make your company a Best Place to work.

Write this on your wall with a red bold Sharpie!

"As my employees go so goes my customers. As my customers go so goes my company. 

If my employees are ever treated less than partners I stand the risk of my customers receiving less At all times I will remember the names (including spouses) and birthdays of my employees as I do my customers. 

Effective leadership in great companies is not a "seat of the pants activity." Jim 

 

 

 Hire Jim Woods. 25 Years of Consulting and Coaching Success. 

Click here to arrange for Jim to speak to or consult with your organization or call +1 719-266-6703 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting +1 719-266-6703 FREE  end_of_the_skype_highlighting. On Twitter Jim is @hyperinnovation  and @innothinkgroup 

Jim Woods is an expert on competitive strategy, uncertainty and innovation. Jim is president and CEO of InnoThink Group, a strategy and uncertainty consulting firm designed to maximize the potential of leaders and organizations. For more on Jim check out his website and follow him on Facebook.  

For over 25 years Jim Woods has helped organizations and individuals achieve their goals, maximize their effectiveness, become more productive, develop confidence, and overcome the fears holding them back. Click here to schedule an appointment.  

via excellenceininnovationblog.posterous.com

 

What Really Motivates You On Your Job and In Your Relationships?

When I speak to leaders, the conversation invariably focuses on how to engage employees whether it’s a top performer who needs to be motivated to stay within the organization (and not lost to the competition) to middle performers who would do even better if they would take things to the next level. Then eventually, to the "C" or underperforming people. So what actually motivates people? What motivates you? 

Take a look at this video adapted from Dan Pink's book, "Drive." 

 

Hire Jim Woods. 25 Years of Consulting Success. 

Click here to arrange for Jim to speak to or consult with your organization or call +1 719-266-6703. On Twitter Jim is @hyperinnovation  and @innothinkgroup 

Jim Woods is an expert on competitive strategy, uncertainty and innovation. Jim is president and CEO of InnoThink Group, a strategy and uncertainty consulting firm designed to maximize the potential of leaders and organizations. For more on Jim check out his website and follow him on Facebook.  

For over 25 years Jim Woods has helped organizations and individuals achieve their goals, maximize their effectiveness, become more productive, develop confidence, and overcome the fears holding them back. Click here to schedule an appointment.  

 

via excellenceininnovationblog.posterous.com

 

Dream Big Dreams | Darren Hardy Success Magazine

I love this time of the year as it provides us the space to reflect, assess and sketch the blueprints to make our New Year dreams come true.

As you do, I’d like to encourage you to dream bigger dreams and adopt the unstoppable achiever’s mindset.

To help you, let me tell you the story of a young boy starting out with a lot less than you have going for you right now.

You wouldn’t think this is the kind of upbringing, nurturing, training and development that would produce one of the most creative minds in history–winning 22 Oscars and 7 Emmy awards from 59 nominations (more than any individual in history) and being honored with the highest civilian award the United States government bestows—the Medal of Freedom.

I think these not only eliminate any excuses you might have, but it will inspire you to consider your own greater potential.

Let’s call this young boy Walter.

Walter was born in Chicago in 1901 to a large Irish immigrant family. His father struggled at work and took out his anger on his wife and children.

At only 8 years old, Walter went to work delivering letters. In any weather, early morning or late at night, he ran through the streets in his worn-out shoes, hurrying to deliver the mail on time. Any money Walter earned was then seized by his father.

At age 16 Walter attempted to enlist in the army to participate in the first World War. He was refused for being too young so he volunteered in the Red Cross and was sent overseas, where he worked as an ambulance driver.

Walter kept the troops in good spirits by decorating his ambulance with amusing drawings. Walter learned he liked to draw.

When Walter returned home from the war, he worked various jobs in creative fields. He worked as a night watchman, which particularly suited him because it gave him an opportunity to study and practice his art.  Later, he got a job at a small studio working on an advertising campaign, where he was paid a meager $40 a month but soon unemployed.

Walter wanted to work for a newspaper as an editorial cartoonist but lacked the satire to do so.

Walter decided to start his own commercial art company, but it was short lived and ultimately failed to sustain. Still not deterred he decided to start yet another company, which this time was met with some success and he was soon hiring a vast number of his friends.

Unfortunately the profits were not enough to cover the high cost of salaries and he mismanaged the money straddling the business with loads of debt, ultimately ending in bankruptcy.

Even his success ended in failure. Certainly this should be a final lesson for him.
But not for Walter.

He recruited his brother to pool some more finances together and they started another business. They didn’t have enough money between them, so they brought on an investor named Mary.

Once again Walter found success and he rehired many of his friends back. One year later, Mary married a man named Charles, who came in and strong-armed Walter. He told Walter if he didn’t comply to budget restraints he would lose his funding for all his now successful productions and all his employees.

Walter refused to be controlled and was once again on his own.

By now you’ve got to be thinking, just hang it up Walter and get a job, entrepreneurship doesn’t seem to be in your cards, right?

Walter would refuse that thought as well. This time Walter decided he would start a Mickey Mouse sort of business. Literally. Walter drew, animated and became the voice of Mickey Mouse.

Walt founded the Walt Disney Company and went on to produce additional characters that have been loved and squeezed by hundreds of millions of children such as Donald Duck, Goofy, Pluto, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Alice in Wonderland, Popeye the Sailor, Pinocchio, Dumbo, Bambi and many more.

Walt’s achiever mindset doesn’t stop there, of course.

On a flight to Chicago in the late 40s he sketched ideas for an amusement park where he envisioned his employees spending time with their children.

Even Walt’s brother Roy thought it was a terrible idea and convinced the Board to disapprove of the funding to build it.

What does Walt do now? His own company won’t go along with building his dream?
Well, Walt has a ceaseless achievers mindset.

Walt went out on his own and raised the money by himself. Walt also inspired a dedicated team called Imagineers… something we all should aspire to be… and together they created and opened The Happiest Place on Earth on Sunday, July 17, 1955.

He built it on ground where only an orange grove existed before. Disneyland is now visited by more than 5 million people every year.

Okay, you create the happiest place on earth, that should be enough right?
Not for the achiever.
In early 1960 Walt conceives of Disney World and EPCOT, this time on top of where only alligators go—in the swamplands of Orlando, Florida.

You have to remember, in the 60s, where the Magical Kingdom resides today, there was nothing there, I mean nothing. The World of Disney, the Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow, known as EPCOT was imagined and built on a full-fledged swamp.

While Walt Disney’s life journey ended on December 15, 1966, when he was 65, the power of his achiever’s mindset lives on to this day.

According to statistics, annual cash flow from Disney films (not including sales and rental of videos) exceeds more than $1 billion dollars. The Disney conglomerate includes amusement parks in California, Florida, Tokyo and Paris, 535 international Disney stores, hockey and baseball teams, a number of newspapers and magazines and a cable television network.

Annual turnover of the consortium is $21 billion and stock market capitalization is $42 billion.
Not bad for a poor Chicago kid from an immigrant family equipped with only one thing, but as you can see, the most important thing—the dream big dreams, achiever’s mindset.

As Walt said himself, “All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.”

That’s what I want to help you do, find the courage to pursue your dreams, your BIG dreams.

Share your big dream with us in comments below. Share this post with others to encourage them to dream big too.

via darrenhardy.success.com

25 Years of Coaching and Consulting Success.

Be More Effective In All the Ways That Matter To You Most! 

Jim Woods Coaching is the ultimate medium for aligning your life with authentic principles and goals. You'll find meaningful success with less, stress, more focus, more peace, more productivity and happier relationships that last. Action is the most important step of achievement. See our clients. 

Click here to start now.

5 Ways to Avoid Sabotaging Your Career | Personal Coaching

A job is a building block. A career is what we build. When starting out, we’re never quite sure what we’re actually building, if anything. We could end up with a useless pile of sticks or a really cool house on a mountaintop.

Careers are not built by ourselves alone. So we need to understand the roles we play (including how we play them) and the potential impact of the supporting cast.

All eyes are on you.

It’s often said: “My career should grow because I do really good work.”

But good work is only one part of it. Well-chosen and savvy professional relationships are another. Without a cadre of colleagues at all levels who attest to your competence, value, and ability to “get along,” your career will likely advance slowly, if at all.

The quality and effectiveness of your workplace relationships are noticed and become part of your personal brand. You can shoot your career in the foot easily by saying or doing things at work that  paint the wrong picture of who you are.

5 cautionary steps

These five steps can help you avoid sabotaging your career along the way: 

1. Don’t get ahead of yourself

The way employees move up is different in every company. Start by figuring out what the leadership sees in those who have been given more responsibility. Be alert to what is said about those who have been promoted. You need to know but don’t have to agree.

Advancement is not about when you think you’re ready. It’s about what the decision-makers think. Until you know, for sure, that you have regularly met the company’s performance standards, defer asking to be promoted or given plumb assignment. 

1. Keep your wants close to your chest

Managers are generally the ones who create opportunities or obstacles to your growth. You may want to assume that your boss is on your side, but that isn’t always the case. So it’s important to build a strong, credible performance portfolio.

Once you tell your boss what you want from your career, s/he has the leverage to help or hinder. So be prudent about how much you let on and when. Timing can be very important.

I once had a client who, at each job change, told his boss that he was “title sensitive” which was also code for wanting to be a big player. In each case, his career stalled.

          Don’t screen yourself out of opportunities

Too often, I’ve heard job seekers and careerists express an interest in positions and job challenges that are a notch up. They say, “I read the duties but I don’t meet  all of them, so I don’t think I should apply.”

It’s not your decision to (de)select yourself. That’s what management’s paid to do. It’s rare to find anyone fitting all the requirements of a job or assignment. What companies are looking for is the one who brings the best blend of knowledge and experience to the role. That may very well be you.

1. Don’t follow someone else’s plan

The most important person to please with your career is you.

Lots of careerists pursue paths that well-meaning others have suggested or chosen for them. Then they wonder why the work doesn’t make them happy.

The first sign of self-leadership is our willingness to identify a life plan and then to start putting the  building blocks together, including those that construct our careers. When you don’t follow your own plan, it’s easy to go adrift.

 

1. Don’t get seduced by the glitz

 

The trappings of better pay, high-sounding titles, greater authority, and any number of perks have a price. I’ve seen many people chase those things without seeing the personal and professional tolls that go with them.

Read more via dawnlennon.wordpress.com

25 Years of Coaching and Consulting Success.

Be More Effective In All the Ways That Matter To You Most! 

Jim Woods Coaching is the ultimate medium for aligning your life with authentic principles and goals. You'll find meaningful success with less, stress, more focus, more peace, more productivity and happier relationships that last. Action is the most important step of achievement. See our clients. 

Click here to start now.

 

How To Make Your Life An Adventure

So, you want to take your life from a 3.1 to a 10 on the adventure scale? I don’t blame you. Nobody wants a bland life. Let’s rip the roof off of your story (to let the snow and falcons in).

No path in life is safe, including boring ones; you might as well pick an adventurous path. Here we go!  Throw some curry in the pot! Light the fireworks! Sound the foghorn! We’re going on an adventure…

Step One: Imagine

The first step of an adventure involves no physical action. You need ideas, and those require the spark of imagination.

“Wow, what if I did THAT?”

While most of us were working our tails off, someone using their imagination said, “dude, what if blankets had sleeves?” and became a millionaire with Snuggies.

For you, it could be a business idea. It could be a home project – building a boat, starting a real life Hunger Games (non-lethal or you’re in big trouble), an adventure-themed book club, making your basement a night club. It could be an urge to move somewhere random or specifically in the world. Or perhaps the thought of quitting your job and taking a sabbatical electrifies you.

It could be anything because now you’re using your imagination.

Imagination is the doorway to adventure.

You might not carry out these crazy ideas, but you should entertain each and every one that appeals to you. Don’t hold back – let your imagination run wild. You’re not committing to anything – you’re just browsing Possibility Magazine and enjoying the pictures. Imagine creating a magazine called Possibility Magazine.

One reason we stop ourselves short on imagination is a rampant disease known as “being realistic.” Here’s what I know about being realistic…

• The moment a blind man scaled Mount Everest, being realistic died.
• The moment people started running more than 100 miles non-stop, being realistic died.
• The moment you realize that people just like you have done the things you once considered out of reach, being realistic will die for you.

Continue to imagine life-shaking ideas. Learn to sail. Learn to dance. Get lost in the woods on purpose like Bear Grylls (careful now!). Start a band. Maybe they’re ideas you’ve frequently had. Pay attention to these – they’re hanging around in your head because deep down you want them. Or you’ll have new ideas are sparking now. Have fun and let your mind go on an adventure.

Step Two: Draw An X On Your Treasure Map

You should be proud of me, because that adventurous phrase up there has a plain name that sounds boring. Goals. *half of readers leave* Hey, come back! Ah, shoot. Well, the rest of you are still here, so I’ll continue.

Any good adventurer has at least a semblance of what he wants out of his journey – even if it is just a belly full of rum and salty skin. But most don’t stop at that. Pirates want the booty, and by that I mean treasure, not the modern usage of the word. Ok, they probably want the that one too, but I want to keep my blog PG-13.

Oh no! It’s the legendary Dollar General Pirate and his ceramic parrot, Edgar!

The difference is in this case, you’re the one drawing the X on the map instead of a legendary pirate 300 years ago. If you want to imagine that a legendary pirate drew your X, I heartily encourage that and give it two hooks up. You’re using your imagination!

This X is going to be one or two of the treasured ideas from your imagination escapade in step one. Don’t worry if it seems difficult to reach or if you’re uncertain about it – because that’s even better! What adventurer has ever gotten a treasure easily?

And now I’m going to halt this program for a brief intermission. Maybe you’re thinking, “yeah, he’s using all this jazzy adventure language and analogies, but the underlying point is the same boring idea of setting a goal and getting it.” To that, I say “Arrrgh!” and “Incorrect!”

Life becomes adventurous the moment you add uncertainty to it. An adventure according to Google’s dictionary is to:

Engage in hazardous and exciting activity, esp. the exploration of unknown territory: “they had adventured into the forest.”

Danger and excitement are aspects of adventure, but it says especially the exploration of unknown territory. Exploring unknown territory is THE determining factor of adventure. So if you tell me your life is boring and you want adventure, you’re simply playing it too safe and close to home. You need to see a new place, or try something new in your current place. Your imagination is how you’ll find these adventurous ideas.

Now, back to your X.

You’ve decided now, right? You have one or more Xs on your map. Good. The next step is to draw your path. Look at your map now. You should see a “you are here” dot. It’s red. No, that’s a sprinkle. Get the cupcake off the map please. Yes, there it is. Ok, now from this dot, calculate exactly what steps are going to bring you from your red dot all the way to your treasure.

Thank you for moving the cupcake. I’m not sure why you chose your big goal to be underwater, but I trust you’re a strong swimmer. PS. My art guy is really talented, isn’t he?

The steps should be as specific as possible, but towards the later stages it might be fuzzier and could change as you move along. That’s ok, just do the best you can, because the most important step you’ll calculate is that first tiny one in front of your red dot. That one is known as the big tiny one.

Step Three: One Small Step, One Brand New Adventure!

Unbelievable. You started out with such a boring life, and now you are holding a treasure map and eating a cupcake? That is a miraculous transformation. I would say your adventure is underway, but it isn’t official yet. You are certainly primed for excitement, but it’s just the same as it was in The Hobbit movie. Bilbo wasn’t on his adventure until he dashed through his gate and said, “I’m going on an adventure!”

You must now do the same, and preferably make it as charming and exciting as Bilbo did. If you want, you can just say it in your computer chair in a monotone voice (not recommended), but it’s better to stand up and pump your fist while you say it.

Alas, saying it is less important than doing it. Taking that first step outside of your safe zone (The Shire) will immediately make it clear – this is adventurous, and frightening. It’s true, the unknown can be a dangerous and scary place, but it’s a very exciting, adventurous place! In The Hobbit, Bilbo had a tussle with trolls almost immediately. He could have been at home eating cheese instead!

But like any story worth telling (or living *ahem*), risk, danger, and uncertainty abound. And we have it easy. A significant majority of our adventures will not be lethally dangerous, but if Mr. Baggins had messed up with those trolls, J.R.R. Tolkien’s book would have been a short tragedy and the Lord Of The Rings would have never happened. Whew.

Now you have a choice. You can keep doing the same things that got you bored and yearning for more. Or you can fire up your imagination, mark your treasure map, plot the course, step outside your front door…

and go on an adventure!

tick…tock…tick…tock…no pressure…tick…tock…Ok, maybe a little…tick…tock…tick…………….Tock. 

via deepexistence.com

25 Years of Coaching and Consulting Success.

Be More Effective In All the Ways That Matter To You Most! 

Jim Woods Coaching is the ultimate medium for aligning your life with authentic principles and goals. You'll find meaningful success with less, stress, more focus, more peace, more productivity and happier relationships that last. Action is the most important step of achievement. See our clients. 

Click here to start now.

9 lessons on persuasion from a preschooler

Right up front, we’re shooting out the disclaimer that whining and throwing a temper tantrum are not part of this list, so if that’s what you were expecting, we hate to disappoint you, but there are times when you might feel it’s come to that if you’re not garnering the online audience for which you were hoping.

Whether it’s sales or readers you’re looking to score, there are helpful lessons to be learned from the wee ones as Jarom Adair at Copyblogger learned when he started closely studying the seemingly limitless persuasive powers of his four-year-old, Elijah.

1. The art of the ask

Despite repeatedly assuring Elijah that he would not find cake at the hardware store during a recent trip, Elijah approached an employee anyway and asked, “Do you have cake?”

Instead of turning him away, the employee led us to the employee lounge where, coincidentally, someone had just celebrated a birthday.

They happily gave Elijah a large slice of birthday cake, and I relearned one of the most basic lessons of persuasion.

Persuasive Tip #1: You’ve got to ask for what you want, or you’ll never persuade anybody to do anything.

And just like asking for cake in a hardware store, there are two common places most writers often don’t think to ask for what they want. They are:

#1 Ask at the end of your article — Any time you’ve given someone something of value (like an informative article on your site), this is a great time to give people a gentle nudge to join your email list or look further into a service or product you offer.

#2 Ask again after they’ve taken action — If someone has just taken action — like joined your email list or purchased something — immediately invite them to take more action. They have action-taking momentum, and it’s a great time to make them an offer they can’t refuse.

Full story at Copyblogger.

Tips on writing.

Photo credit: Annie Colbert

via holykaw.alltop.com